I'm typing something or
Playing music or
I'm taking a picture or video
fully engaged with telling some sort of story
I'm always somewhere doing something
even asleep I am caught in the middle
Lately things have been more nebulous
pulling the meaning from the images
is harder and paradoxically easier
When I'm awake I feel as if I'm asleep
sleeping feels like running through wet cement uphill
Exhaustion on my back and pulling my feet
I'm drowning in myself
and this obsession to keep up the projection
It's easy to stay unharmed
If all I put out there is a hologram
myself interpreted into being
Deep inside there's this block of ice
pain I can describe
but I never really let go
I wonder if I'll ever know new reality
or if I'll keep up this spinning tale
until I breathe no more
and people struggle with identification
speaking for me
even though my entire being
is wrapped up in speaking for myself
