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The morning creeps slowly into my conciousness. I sit, numbed by my rented coffee. Cold by now, yet warming my brain into mediocrity. I see Gods grace through the pale majesty of the rising sun and I feel small. The birds share the morning; quietly prolcaiming the start of a new day, a new year, a new life. Awareness sparks anew with the dawn and while I contemplate the mystery of existence, pidgeons stare blankly without concern or care. I worry about survival yet they just survive. I anylize, I ponder, I agonize, I drive myself to madness. I have just enough awareness to put me in a grave. I greve over things I can't possibly change and I rejoice in things I have nothing to do with. Do birds agonize and greve and ask favors of the impossible? I wonder not so silently about the nature of existence while they just exist in nature. The passage of time ticks by second by second by hour by day. Woe piles over optimisim and hope defeats wow and above it all the sun still rises and the birds still sing. I am warm against the cold, light against the darkness. God has placed me in this moment according to his purpose and while I wonder, I still know, through the shower of light and beauty of the rising sun, I am loved. The chill of the wind never lasts forever...
